Monthly Archives:

May 2014

Education

Love Honey Sqweel Giveaway!

Masturbation May is racing along at a delightful, pleasure filled pace. And we are celebrating!

We have two gorgeous give-aways happening at Polkadotsi right now… The first is a LoveHoney Sqweel oral sex simulator. I have been given one to review by the good folks at LoveHoney, and I must say, it’s unlike any other sex toy I’ve had the pleasure of trying… I will be posting a review shortly..!

The world’s best oral sex simulator for women just got even better! Sqweel 2 features a wheel with 10 lapping silicone tongues, 3 powerful speeds, 30% more power and a new reversible mode and flicker function for incredible orgasms every time.

This upgraded oral sex simulator features all-new functions, a compact and slick case and a 10 tongue wheel made from the smoothest of silicone. Its reverse functionality allows you to switch the direction of the tongues and a flicker setting rocks the wheel back and forth for out-of-this-world sensations.

All of Sqweel’s settings are customisable with 3 scintillating rotation speeds, giving you a whopping 9 different options to explore.

Apply lashings of top-quality water-based sex lube to yourself and the wheel of tongues for extra slippery play.

Key Features:

  • Innovative oral sex simulator with 30% more power than the original Sqweel
  • 10 silicone tongues spin at 3 powerful speeds
  • Reversible wheel for varied pleasure
  • Flicker function for intensified stimulation
  • In a compact, travel-friendly case

To win; simply comment on any post at Polkadotsi with your thoughts, and feelings, and the hashtag #Sqweeel! We’ll pick the most insightful and creative post at the end of May to send a Sqweel to!

Be creative, be insightful, have fun!

Entry is subject to our standard terms and conditions

Education, Featured, Orgasms, Your Body

The Health Benefits Of A Good Old Wank!

The Birds and The Bees

Birds do it, bees do it, even educated fleas do it – Let’s do it, let’s have a waannnnkkkk!

Masturbation is a perfectly healthy, natural activity – mammals, birds and amphibians have all been observed engaging in a little bit of self-pleasuring…yep, that’s right the monkey really does do some spanking.

And just for your viewing pleasure – here’s some Australian native wildlife getting busy – a koala banging one off…

watch?v=w06tXEzP9G8&index=5&list=PL540322C914A242F8

…and a kangaroo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jsp_6IRT_uI&list=PL540322C914A242F8

Yay for Skippy!

Masturbation has been observed in deer, monkeys and walruses – even squirrels like to find their nuts. And we ladies and gents are just another mammal.

So Just Who is Wanking?

The Great British public are profuse wankers – with 73% of men and nearly 37% of women reporting having a ham shank in the last four weeks (Gerressu, Mercer, Graham, Wellings and Johnson, 2006). And what’s even cooler – those with higher levels of education, more frequent intercourse and a greater repertoire of sexual activities are more likely to knock one off. And those of the US of A can be attributed with being tossers too, with 38% of women and 61% of men reporting masturbation over the preceding year, which often complemented an active and pleasurable sex life (Das, 2007). Here in Australia 67% of men and 36% of women have engaged in masturbation within the last 12 months.

Ahhh – great nations of those who like to rub one out…it makes the heart fairly glow.

Infantile Masturbation

Even when we are very young we will naturally touch our genitals once we have learnt that by stimulating this area it feels good. And this is normal.

On an aside: it’s interesting to note that infantile masturbation or gratification behaviour – or what some clinicians refer to as gratification disorder (what’s that all about?!)-   and its accompanying grunting, rocking and sweating is sometimes a cause of concern for some parents who might rush their kids off for checks and investigations with the worry that they’re suffering from some form of epilepsy or movement disorder. Which would be kinda quirky if I wasn’t talking about clinical studies that have actually been written…But hey ho, live and learn right?

Kids like to get their rocks off too – and that’s perfectly OK and normal and doesn’t mean that they actually want to hump or get involved in sexual activities. And one for those parents out there who’s noticed Scout likes to play with her foo-foo – Having a positive attitude and communication with little girls (and boys) about masturbation and sexual self-exploration can have long-term beneficial effects upon their view of their sexual self and their subsequent sexual activity in later life (Hogarth & Ingham, 2009). So go easy on the kids and let them know that pleasure is awesome for its very own sake – it will be good for them in the long run.

Oiling the Cogs

Yes of course the post-orgasmic satiation following partnered penis-in-vagina (PIV) intercourse (if you swing that way) can often be physiologically greater than what we may achieve with masturbation (Brody & Kruger, 2006). Yet masturbation can be effective in treating orgasmic dysfunction or premature ejaculation, familiarise ourselves with our bodies and sexual responses and fulfil our sexual needs. Additionally, we are most definitely oiling our cogs: the functionality of the circulatory, neural and muscular systems of the genitalia is maintained by arousal and orgasm (Levin, 2007). Lubing up means better sexual functioning, which in turn will mean a greater ability to feel sexual pleasure or orgasm more easily – sheeeezzzam.

Masturbation: Self-Cultivating and Self-Loving or Learning to Make Your Flower Grow

Flicking the bean also has many cultivating properties – that’s right tickling your fancy has nurturing benefits. Not only does it strengthen our relationship with ourselves when we get to know, love and nurture ourselves – but by hanging out with who we know best we can improve sexual confidence and grow through self-awareness.

Masturbation can strengthen our relationship with others. By getting to know how to tame our own little beast we are learning how to identify, recognise, articulate and experience what brings us pleasure, which is an extremely powerful step in our self-development. By jilling off we can meet our own needs and then by sharing these experiences with others we can deepen our communication skills, openness and sexual honesty. That makes a little game of ‘Ring-a-ring-a roses’, a mind-blowing tool in our relationship and sexual arsenal.

And here’s some other Health Benefits of Masturbation while we’re at it:

  • Eases abdominal cramps during menstruation
  • Improves pre-menstrual symptoms
  • Relieves migraine headaches
  • Suppresses pain
  • Eases the symptoms of restless leg syndrome
  • Relieves feelings of frustration and stress
  • Helps relaxation by interfering with ruminations (going over and over an argument or previous social interaction again and again)
  • Lifts your spirits
  • by releasing mood-boosting hormones

So why aren’t we wanking?

It was really only quite recently in the seventeenth century that masturbation became viewed as a self-polluting vice. Then in the eighteenth and nineteenth century the medical profession got involved with the belief that the good old wank, or onanism, was both injurious and morally degenerative (Lacquer, 2003). It was claimed that masturbation would lead to blindness, insanity and impotence. Times have, thankfully, moved on since then and we now know that no amount of spanking the monkey is going to make your palms hairy…science and research is well behind us on this one ladies – wanking is officially GOOD FOR YOU!

 

Brody, S. & Kruger, T. (2006). The post-orgasmic prolactin increase following intercourse is greater than following masturbation and suggests greater satiety. Biological Psychology, 71, 3, 312-   315.

Das, A. (2007). Masturbation in the United States. Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, 33, 4, 301-  317.

Gerressu, M., Mercer, C.H., Graham, C.A., Wellings, K. & Johnson, A.M. (2008). Prevalence of  masturbation and associated factors in a British national survey. Archives of Sexual               Behaviour, 37, 266-278.

Hogarth, H. & Ingham, R. (2009). Masturbation among young women and associations with sexual  health: An exploratory study. The Journal of Sex Research, 46, 6, 558-567.

Laquer, T. W. (2003). Solitary sex: A cultural history of masturbation. Brooklyn, N. Y., U.S.A: Zone Books

Levin, R. J. (2007). Sexual activity, health and well-being – the beneficial roles of coitus and masturbation. Sexual and Relationship Therapy, 22,1, 135-148.

Nechay, A., Ross, L.M, Stephenson, J.B.P. & O’Regan (2004). Gratification disorder (‘infantile masturbation’): a review. Archives of Disease in Childhood, 89, 225-226.

Queensland Goverment (2003). Sex in Queensland : A companion report to The Australian and New Zealand Journal of Public Health, 2003, Volume 27, Number 2. Queensland : Queensland               Government.

Yang, M. L., Fullwooe, E, Goldstein, J. & Mink, J. W. (2005). Masturbation in infancy and early childhood presenting as a movement disorder: 12 cases and a review of literature.      Paediatrics, 116, 6, 1427-1432.

 

Photo credit:  bibacomua

Sex Ed

Sex Outdoors: How To (Without Getting Caught)

Loads of people get a real rush from getting freaky in the great outdoors. The threat of being caught heightens the thrill for some, while others simply like the freedom of a quickie under the stars.

The Beach

It’s a huge cliché, but for some reason many of us have this enduring fantasy about sex on the beach. There’s sun or moonlight and the crashing of waves – but there are also other beachgoers and sand in rather unwelcome places. If you’re intent on ticking this one off your list, find a secluded spot – preferably outside of holiday peak season – and take a large blanket with you. Staying partially clothed, or keeping your swimmers on, can be a saving grace if anyone happens to stroll down the sand towards you. Nothing to see here! Just two lovebirds enjoying the ambience.

The Park

Taking in a neighborhood stroll and suddenly have the urge to ravage your lover? A quick nip into a public park or playground is a popular option for many, and can provide some fun opportunities for play. Sit on a swing so your lover can use the motion for added thrust, or hang on to those monkey bars as you wrap your legs around his waist. Take turns keeping lookout, and choose small parks in safe, quiet streets to evade prying eyes.

Da Club

Okay, not technically outdoors, but still very public. If the thumping bass of the music and dancefloor grinding is too enticing for you to ignore, it is possible to get it on in a crowded club without getting caught. Hundreds of thousands of lovers can probably testify to that. But it’s not quite as simple as adjusting your twerk. Disabled bathrooms are a popular option due to the privacy they can provide, although occupying a dedicated stall for seven minutes in heaven is probably not going to go unnoticed – or win you any favors if you emerge to find someone waiting to use it. If the club has booths, these are probably your best bet. Oral sex can sometimes be discreetly achieved using the cover of a table, or position yourself so you’re sitting in your lover’s lap and keep your movements subtle. You could just be cuddling.

Three Golden Rules, Wherever You Do It

Stay classy. This might seem impossible if you plan on having your butt hanging out in public, but retaining some decorum – and respect for others – is important. Don’t set out to have sex in front of unsuspecting passersby.

Don’t get so caught up in the moment you prompt anyone to come check out the action, or worse, call the police. Even if you are able to achieve an earth-shattering orgasm in an outdoor space, be a good, non-scary human and do your best to keep the vocals to a minimum.

High-fives on using condoms but be sure to take your evidence with you, or throw it in the trash. No one wants to stumble across the proof of your erotic encounter the following day.

What’s the craziest place you’ve had sex outdoors or in public?

Sex Toys 101, Your Body

Sex Toy Smarts: Water-Based Versus Silicone Lube

Think anything slippery will do the trick when it comes to your sex toys? Whatever you have on hand might be good enough in the short term, but you can actually shorten the life of your favorite pleasure piece if you fail to use the right lubricant with it. Not only that, but using the wrong lube can actually cause the wrong kind of friction, which can lead to soreness. Boo! Prolong the life of your toys and make using them a whole lot more enjoyable. Here’s how to choose the right lube for your bedtime buddy.

Water

Water-based lubricants are generally the safest to use with the majority of sex toys, so if you’re not sure what exactly your toy is made of, stick with water-based in the meantime. If you’re not sure what your toys are made of, be sure to check out our post What Are Your Sex Toys Really Made Of? Some cheaper materials can actually contain toxins you’ll want to keep well away from your cooch, so do your research now. If you can’t figure out what your current toys are made of, it might be a good excuse time to invest in some quality replacements. 

But back to water-based lube. While this type of lubricant glides well and is usually easy to clean up, it does have a tendency to dry out, or be absorbed into the skin, more quickly than other varieties, meaning you may have to reapply it.

Silicone

Silicone lubricants are popular because they offer advantages above water-based lubes. First, they tend to be thicker and longer lasting, so you usually only need to apply them once per sexy session. Second, they’re not soluble in water, so if you like to take your toys with you into the shower or bath, you’ll need a lubricant that isn’t going to be washed away.

On the downside, the fact that silicon lubricants are thicker and longer-lasting means you’ll need to be far more careful about cleaning your toys after use to ensure every last bit of used lube is washed off.

Though inexperienced sex toy shoppers may be forgiven for assuming silicone lube is the best option for silicone toys, the opposite is actually true. Silicone lubricants should never be used with silicone or cyberskin toys, since they can actually break down the surface of your toy – making it a breeding ground for bacteria.

Remember; only ever use a dedicated sexual lubricant with your sex toys, or with your partner. Using anything else you might find in your kitchen or bathroom cabinets can damage your toy – and worse – prove harmful to you.

 

FTG900x100femalefriendly

Sex Ed

Masturbation Technique: Vibrating Fingers

If you’re new to vibrators finger vibrators are cute, non-threatening, and oh-so-easy-to-use. They’re also inexpensive compared to their bigger, penetrative, counterparts!

Finger vibes are designed to be used on your clit and labia. They’re a really fun way to explore what feels good on the outside.

Don’t get caught up with only your clit. Be sure to tease, tickle and explore your labia. The sensations are far more subtle, but very pleasurable. Experiment and discover what feels great for you!

Here are a few options to consider, from the hi-tech to the cute and buzzy!

Jimmy Jane Hello Touch

Say Hello to your partner in a whole new sexy way. Touch and sizzle with the Hello Touch by Jimmyjane, a brand spanking new wearable couples vibrator.

Simply pop the Hello Touch onto your fingertips and then engage in foreplay such as clitoral stimulation, G-Spot stimulation, prostate stimulation – or just explore your partners body and see where you get a reaction!

jimmy_jane_hellotouch

Tenga Vi Bo Ring Orb

VI-BO Ring Orb has a small vibrating ball with a silicone covering. It has a generous loop of silicone that can be placed around the shaft of a penis or finger without pinching.

The ball is removable and exchangeable with other VI-BO products.

tenga picobong

Key by Jopen Pyxis Finger Massager

With its clever shape and ambidextrous design, the Pyxis finger massager is ideal for both solo and partner play.

Great for warming up pre-sex, but even better to continue during intercourse and you are nearly guaranteed to make the most difficult woman climax!

Use Pyxis for solo masturbation, or in the shower with its waterproof body.

key

We’ve featured the range at MiMi Deluxe.com  – chosen for their visual appeal, functionality, and tried and tested quality.

Polkadotsi hasn’t been paid to publish this post! We just love the gorgeousness.

 

Photo credit:  piotr_marcinski

 

Featured, Orgasms

Celebrate Your Solo Sex Life

I loved reading about Emma Stewart’s commitment to discovering masturbation as a sexually experienced adult, but I worried that my fellow wankers may feel that that their early and frequent masturbation schedule is somehow unusual. So I thought I would take a deep breath, kick the cultural shame around talking about masturbation in the butt, and give you some accounts of my “Tours of Tasmania.”

The Not So Innocent Beginnings

So, rather embarrassingly, the first person that inspired sexual feelings was Mike Myers as Austin Powers. I was about eleven having a sleep over at my older cousin’s house, staying up late and watching the films I wasn’t allowed to watch at home. Having a bath the next day, the spa sex scene I had furtively watched the day before popped into my head. I felt a flush over my body and discovered all sorts of nice feelings existed, but fully fledged orgasms were a few years away.

The World of Fantasy

High school friends introduced me to fan fiction and shortly after graduation I discovered the rabbit hole of Slash – fanfic erotica. While previously solo sex had just been straight forward physical self-experimentation, sexual fantasy opened up and extended the physical, emotional and intellectual pleasures of solo sex. Erotic fantasy allows you to explore your creativity, your desires, to transcend any limitations and to experience the unattainable. Well, so I thought. One fateful drunken Thursday night, I met my kink and sexual match. A sporadic, yearlong affair began where all the things in my head were explored and expanded upon. I discovered that partner sex wasn’t necessarily the point or the best part of sexuality. In this affair, I often chose not to seek an orgasm, as it would add to the dom/sub role play, but the memories have enriched my solo sex life for years after. Sex isn’t something that I needed to seek from someone else; wanking wasn’t a sign of sexual failure. Instead sex is something that I am and have. Sex and orgasms aren’t given to me or taken from me in a healthy interaction, they are shared.

Things that Buzz

Apart from the occasional vegetable that got re-purposed for non-nutritional uses, I have never been particularly enamoured by sex toys. Perhaps because my introduction to them was a rather tragic knock off rabbit vibrator that came in a Sexpo show bag. But generally the noise and the feeling of having a disembodied dick present interrupted my ability to fantasise, so I found the whole thing counterproductive to achieving orgasms. Many years later, and after birthing a child, how I feel about my body, what turns me on and even the type of touch I enjoy has completely changed. My tried and tested fantasies and techniques have lost their hold on me and I need to relearn my own sexuality. Acknowledging that my sex just no longer fit in the box I assumed I was in is liberating and exciting. There is now an endless world of exploration ahead of me as I change. Things I had previously said, “No, I definitely don’t like that,” now excite me.

If you have been subscribed to Polkadotsi for even a little while, you are well aware that there is wide and wonderful world of self-pleasure tools out there. Maybe it’s time to equip myself.

 

Bright Desires

Education

Masturbation Technique: Feather Light and Barely There

This is a teasing, tantalising, titillating technique! It’s all about your clit and if you can be patient enough, this little flick of the bean is well worth the tease! You don’t need toys for this technique, its just you and your fingers! Keep it light, try teasing strokes and flicks. Experiment with the different parts of your clit. The key is the feather light touch.

The feather light barely there technique focusses entirely on your clitoris. To begin with you REALLY will want to start off with the most barely there of touches. Your little button is sensitive, the lightest of touch can be too much…

Set aside time to really get into this, and let your clit warm up to your touch. Use only the tip of your finger, and lightly, ever so lightly buzz your finger over your clit.

Don’t increase the pressure, just ride the waves of arousal until you can bare it no longer. Remember to take your time, this isn’t a race, think of it as an orgasmic marathon.

You don’t need a goal, you’re not pleasing anyone but yourself,  this is just pleasure. Breathe and focus on the beautiful sensations in your body.

 

Photo credit:  nelka7812

 

Body Positive Activism, Education, Orgasms, Sex Ed

Sex For One With Satin

How do you masturbate? Is it quick, silent, and over as fast as possible? I’m going to encourage you to try something new.. something a little different, perhaps something indulgent.

Masturbation is all about discovering your body, finding what turns you on, what feels deliciously good, and being present to the delightful sensations.

For this little exercise in sex for one, you’ll need some satiny, silky fabric. Think slinky stockings, a silky nighty, boxer shorts, or even a satin pillow case. I have been told that satin fabrics are slinkier and softer than real silk, and they’re easier to wash..!

Set the mood, and set aside time just for yourself when you’re not going to be interrupted. I deeply encourage you to use a hand mirror to watch yourself, and watch your beautiful pussy as it gets more aroused… watch as it changes, becomes engorged, slippery, sexy….

Or if you’re feeling really daring, film yourself as you discover and explore the folds of your vulva. (Word to the wise, most smart phones have an auto upload feature. Be sure to turn that off if you’re not comfortable with the potential of your video making it to the net!) (I like to use an old school digital camera with no wifi!)

Dim the lights, get comfortable, and explore your gorgeous, sexy pussy using the piece of silky, satiny fabric as a delightful, teasing, pleasure -tool just for you.

Be present to the sensations, breathe, feel your sexual energy pulse through your body. Experiment with touch – firm, feathery light, fast, slow,  lightly drag the satin across your vulva, slide it over your vulva, pull it taught and tease your clit through the fabric… play and discover what feels good.

We would absolutely LOVE if you would like to share your satiny adventures. Feel free to comment below!

Enjoy!

 

Photo Credit: andresr

Featured, Sex Positions, Your Body

4 Fun-Fit Positions for Sexercise

We’re obsessed with getting – or doing – two things for the price of one, aren’t we? It’s like one thing isn’t good enough anymore. We want to multitask and maximize our time, and we want our favorite things to be made even better by being combined with something equally amazing. It’s the mindset that gave birth to cronuts, and it’s the reason scientists continue to research how many calories we burn during sex… and the reason we keep wanting to brush up on their findings.

Despite scientists’ best efforts, their research on whether sex really is good exercise is still pretty inconclusive. They agree that an average sex session burns more calories than a leisurely walk – but not as many as a jog. If you’re thinking you can quit your gym membership and just have more sex you might be jumping the gun a little – although it really depends on the kind of sex you’re having, and how much effort you’re putting in to work those love muscles.

Intent on swapping the boredom of the treadmill for sexercise? Here are a few positions that could help you increase the burn.

Standing Screw

Have you mastered the tricky art of screwing while standing? Obviously, you’re going to be working a little harder – and using different muscles – if you’re getting it on vertically rather than horizontally. You might have to stand on your tiptoes, but you’ll tone your butt and legs.

Thigh-Master Kneel

Have your partner kneel opposite you, then slide on top of him, so your thighs are either side of his. You’ll have greater support while kneeling, but you’ll still work your thighs and gluteal muscles.

Double-Whammy Bridge

Lay on your back and form an arch by bending your legs and raising your butt off the bed, then have your lover move between your legs and enter you as he supports your hips with his hands. This position can be great for clitoral and G-spot stimulation – and it will provide an unbeatable workout for your bum and legs.

Core-Crazy Coitus

This is a variation on the Double-Whammy Bridge, but instead of forming an arch with your back, you’ll want to raise your butt even higher and have your outstretched legs resting against your partner’s shoulders. Be sure to support your lower back with your hands, and try and keep your legs reasonably straight. You’ll work your bum and legs, as well as your arms and your core.

What’s your favorite sexercise? Have you mastered a tricky position you think every woman should keep in her fun-fitness arsenal?

Education, Featured, Sex Ed, Your Body

Masturbation May is Here!

May is Masturbation and Self Discovery Month! None of us should need any convincing that masturbation is amazing – because orgasms! – but did you know flicking the bean can also be great for your overall wellbeing and your sex life?

Orgasms offer wide range of benefits, including stress busting, so getting yourself to the Big O should really be part of your mental health self-care. Masturbating also helps us understand our bodies and get a good feel for what we like and what gets us off, which then translates to all-round mind-blowing sex with a partner. Need I say more? Check out 4 Reasons to Let Your Guy Watch You Masturbate.

If you haven’t quite gotten the hang of self-discovery, or you’ve been experiencing a little bit of a self-love dry-spell as of late, now’s the time to assign yourself some homework, Mrs!

Masturbation is a very personal, intimate experience, and everyone is different in terms of what works for them. Below are some great tips to help you on your way…

Know Thyself

This Hands-On Guide to Masturbation from Refinery29 offers some great pointers, including:

  • Get to know your body. Understand your anatomy, and touch yourself any place that feels good
  • Discover what turns you on. Read erotica and indulge in fantasy to help get yourself in the mood.
  • Experiment with touch. Stoke, rub, circle, tap and squeeze to see what feels best.
  • Set the mood. Create an environment where you can feel relaxed, and let yourself be turned on without distraction.
  • Find a favorite toy. Try clitoral and internal stimulation, and see what feels best.
  • Choose a favorite position. Changing positions can change sensations; so don’t be afraid to mix it up.
  • Invite your partner to join in or watch. Masturbation doesn’t have to be a solo venture, and masturbating together can be great for your relationship.

Enjoy the Journey

Similarly, Cosmo’s Hands-On Guide to Solo Sex offers this pearl of wisdom:

Try not to be super goal-oriented, like, ‘I have to have an orgasm in less than 15 minutes’… Just ride the wave of pleasure as your nether regions become more sensitive, your heart rate zooms, your breathing intensifies, and the walls of your vagina begin to contract — all telltale signs you’re bound for bliss.

Mix It Up

And Women’s Health Magazine’s Best Masturbation Tips Ever assets:

Variety is key to your sex life, so why shouldn’t that extend to your self-love life? If you need more convincing, know this: By masturbating the same way every time, you might have more difficulty getting off when you’re with a partner. So stay flexible.

Happy Masturbation Month, ladies! If you have a top tip of your own to share, spill it in the comments below.